Phase Two

Phase One is over, Phase Two has begun. I am currently watching two rather strapping tree surgeons murder our ash tree and chop it up into small logs for our woodburner. There are a lot of logs. I feel sorry for the tree. It's 70 years old and hasn't harmed a soul. Still, we will be recycling the logs and woodchips and planting three new trees in its place.

The next job is the concrete shed base. I'm waiting for one last quote.

Retro cool in the kitchen

I've now spent three days working on the kitchen - two days preparing the walls and ceilings and half a day doing the first coat on the ceiling. It's great to say goodbye to the horrible brown stains left by the previous owner who'd obviouslty had a few floods. Dad spent time filling in some of the holes in the ceiling so when the whole lot is painted brilliant white it should make it much more bearable. With no plans to start the extension until Chloe is at school, we had to do something.

Work is going well at the moment. I feel like I am producing a full time persons output but I have to be thankful I have the chance to work under such flexible conditions. I still won't be happy until my "trial" period is over though - uncertainty is a bad thing.

Back to the renovation

I've now spent two days taking wallpaper off the ceiling in the kitchen and preparing all the surfaces to be painted a lovely, clean brilliant white. It would have been much more sensible to wait until I'd finished painting before ordering the lino, however, at least the new floor has kick started me into action. White walls and cheap as chips lino will make the kitchen bearable for the next three or four years whilst we save up for the building work.

Maybe, just maybe

My fourth day ended on a much better note than the previous three. I'm pre-empting my boss all the time and she is "really enjoying working with me" (this was written in an email). For the first time, I can see the possibility that this might work. They are going to advertise the job share soon and will say I work eight days a month. They also want me involved with the interviews. I am determined to give this my best shot so here goes nothing.

Living in two worlds

It's been a week but I know it's going to be hard to get used to second time around. Switching between work life and home life is hard. At work I immediately reverted back to my old career girl self with exciting challenges and a buzz from simply doing a good job. At home, on a non working day, I have to turn on the "stay at home Mum" button and carry on as if nothing has changed.

Admittedly, it would be easier if I didn't have a "trial" period to work through and the underlying threat of possible redundancy. That feeling won't going away until my review at the end of April. In the meantime, I've got to get my head down, work to the very best of my ability and treat it as a three month consultancy contract.

Sandra called yesterday. She might have a consultancy job for me. T`he timing could be perfect.

Back to work - blah

First official day back at work was rubbish. New boss, new job, new desk, impossible targets and a big fat cloud over everything. Instead of a single career woman, my new boss is a career woman with a stay-at-home husband who looks after their 3 year old - am not sure what is worse for me. Are they setting me up for a fall? I have to rise above it, do my best and see what happens. Roll on the Pink Paintbrush.

Back to work

I had a "keeping in touch" day in the office on Friday and it went okay. I have mixed feelings about going back in February. On the one hand, I know it's sensible both financially and career wise. However, I love being a full time Mum and am not looking forward to juggling childcare and missing out on playdates for David. One thing it did make me realise was just how much I want to do my P & D course so that's a good thing.

I'm still a bit anxious about the pre-school. I've read a few comments on various websites that say montessori schools encourage individual develpopment but this may be at the cost of social interaction. David is a very sociable child but I can't help but worry about the effects of a montessori pre-school as opposed to a main stream pre school. My only option is to see how he gets on during his first term and then make a decision. If I want him to leave, I have to give a full term's notice which means making a decision when term ends at Easter.